Wonderful Apathey.

its probably not spelt that way. but fuck it. i am highly contented in my state of doing nothing. listening to Gym Class Heros who, strangely enough i find are quiet good *makes worried face* oh well, i cant wait to see Will tomorrow, though i hope he understands that i dont want to be all touchy feely in school, there is a time and a place for that shit and its not there. i am sort of worried about him coming to denmark. but oh well.

Faces in the Hall - Gym Class Heros

I knew this kid named Alberto
Funny style cat
And his girl looked like a turtle
Not Lisa Turtle, just a turtle
High school track
He ran the hurdle
His peers shed tears senior year when he got murdered
Now Alberto was your average A student
Participated in class,
Never came late
And never truant
His family was picture perfect
His older sister was prom queen
His dad a decorated vet from the Vietnam team
His mother was Dear Abby,
An ordinary house wife
Like clockwork, always had dinner on the table at 5
But Alberto had a monster he kept under his bed
Instead of letting it out,
He just got a girlfriend instead
She knew something was funny
She could tell by his behavior
Or the way he flamboyantly shook his hand
When he would wave to her
She thought nothing of it
And just shoved it in the closet
Until the day that word dripped out like leaky faucet
Alberto was homosexual
I ain't have nothing against it
But little Ronnie Johnson and all his football player friends did
They'd always pick and nagCall him "fag" and such and such
And couldn't wait to get to gym so they could really bust his nuts
The gym teacher never cared
He'd just join in on the action
He'd make silly gestures
And compared him to Micheal Jackson
Alberto couldn't take it
He'd just stop showing up and whenever he walked them halls
He just felt like throwin' up
And night he would cry and cry and ask "God why?"
Like "God, why the fuck'd I have to be born this way?"
God would reply, "Son, you've gotta show 'em you're more than gay"
Cause he had dreams to be a track star
Until that warm April night
Them gay jokes went way too far
Ronnie begged for his forgiveness
And invited him to a party
Cause his parents went away
And left him plenty of Bacardi
Alberto kindly accepted
He was finally accepted
Except it was all deception
And left them all unprotected
It was a plan Ronnie had scammed
To get him in the right place
Verbally degrade and rearrange his pretty face
The plan would go swiftly
They started calling him sissy
One punch turned into fifty
They beat him till he was dizzy
Now Alberto lie in blood
While his peers look on in fear
He took his last breath
And passed away his senior year
Needless to sayIt was one big tragedy
And how was Ronnie gonna explain to his family,
While they were on vacation taking in sights
He got wasted and killed a kid that night
Don't be a slave and behave the way they do,
Just utilize the gifts that God gave you
I knew this girl named Maria
Bright and talented
With aspirations to be a
Big superstar
What a great idea
Until she fell off and started to listening to her peers
Oh dear!
Now Maria was your typical obnoxious
Analytical head strong rebel
Flippin' off the principal
Single mother home structure
She looked after baby brother
While mom worked two jobs
Just to buy supperPops was a struggling musician
Troubled man,
Juggling family and heroin addiction
He overdosed and left a notice of eviction
And a crate of records on the table in the kitchen
And a little angel with a keen sense of sound
Who saw silence in the records she found
And she would stay up late at night
Reciting songs to herself
Under pale moonlight
Righting wrongs that her pops made,
Promised her mom she'd never go that same route
Turns out
Carrie Anne had other plans
Her and her man Ronnie most popular,
Second best to nobody
Homecoming queen versus ugly duckling
And the story ends the same way
OK, Ronnie's parents went away for a couple of days
And told him "No Drinking"
What the fuck were they thinking?
Maria was oblivious that her boyfriend had already been invited
So when Carrie Anne asked
She got all excited
Like "damn now I got something to look forward to"
Or so she thought
Maria kindly accepted,
She was finally accepted,
Except it was all bullshit
Not pay attention,
Carrie Anne hated Maria cause she could sing
So she scored a bag of heroin
But the craziest thing was
Maria never touched drugs, she did that night
And when her man was getting beat
She was nowhere in sight
Now her boyfriend lie in blood
And she had no idea
Alberto passed away and she got hooked her senior year
Needless to say
It was one one big tragedy
And I hate to break it but
It doesn't end happily
A warm day in May,
The sky was so beautiful
Carrie Anne died in a crash leaving the funeral

mind flip.

i am feeling hugely sick and dizzy right now and i have no idea why. i may have eaten too much dark chocolate but all i want to do is die. i am browsing allpoetry getting depressed at the fact that i have no trophies, this is most likely (i like to think) because i never enter any contests. but it may just be because i suck monkey balls at writing poetry. i was re-reading all of my poetry and i hate it. all of it apart from 'I Am:' which only ever got a silver. if i remove it from the contest will i loose the silver trophy? i dont know. Lost and Found is the worst, i hadnt read it in such a long time, why didnt anyone tell me it was crap. oh god my head.
however on a lighter note, hot guys like my tartan dress ^^ voodiedoo. it may have been the one and only good point of going to that gig yesturday which sucked warm puke through a straw (apart from the fact that Michelle was there with me) i will rant about it later, but i can honestly say i have whiped my arse with things more punk than that concert.

a very delirious mole
xxx

Potter Puppet Pals.

i have recently gotten rather obsessed with these cartoons so i will now spread the love to all of you little muggle children.

The Yule Ball.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hp_197sBvHc&mode=related&search=
thi si thier first live prerformance and you cant help but feel i dont know, happy for them theyre only like 18 and its become quiet a big thing!

The Mysterious Ticking Noise.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tx1XIm6q4r4&mode=related&search=
oh god, i want to get 5 people and do this!!!

Wizard Angst.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xD-Huwlg2kY&mode=related&search=
i love how they cant actually change their facial expressions.

babysitting time ^^

haha this entry is now a day old, i didnt get the chance to update it after babysitting. i am now £50 the richer ^^ no not just from baby sitting but from working a day and a half (£30) for father dear. which means that i can now buy michelle her birthday present and father his fathers day present. (i'm going to get him an edition of 'Marine Boy' as he said that was the only anime that he ever watched).
i spent the day with Will and i dont know, it was wierd. i spent most of the time thinking that it would probably be a good idea to break up with him and the other half adoring his very existance... i dont know he is wonderful and really imature at the same time and its so frustrating you know? i also want this to last because i want to have had a relationship that was over more than just a month. im not looking for marrage >.< but i want to know what its like to be with someone for that long (lyk omfg 2 mnths!) one thing i love about summer is the way that we can leave the front door open in our house. it just makes the house feel that much more, welcoming you know. i really like my house. yes anyway back to Will, i dont know. i really like him and i dont. i dont know what to do *sigh*
oh and Santa did not forget me, i got a call from him on friday, and texted him all that evening, he was sweet i think but abit strange as he mimicked my vocabulary (like using shall and such) but in text language. but then when i mentioned that i was cooking he said 'i'm glad that you can cook, because then you shall cook us dinner' uhm... no?
so yeah, alittle bit freaked out by that. and he suggested we 'meet up and have some fun' :S AND I STILL CANT REMEMBER HIS NAME! im going to ask him how he spells it. oh i am clever.
oh well maths tomorrow, im really tired.

Will and Santa...

hmmmm, i had an amazing day today i think.
got up had a shower, washed hair, got dressed, thought id lost my MP3 player >.< almost died, talk about heart attack! anyway i found it situated within the glove compartment (thank GOD). then off in the car with mother. Dad was off to counceling... mum had told him to. he hasnt talked to me about it, he is ignoring me. which is slightly scary as if he is angry with me, he will shout. but now he just blanked me the whole drive home. oh well im too happy to care ^^
so yes got into gloucester and i imidiatly headed (naturaly) to Wortikas, were i spent a happy 2 hours reading Niel Gaiman's Eternals.
its good but not, okay its just not Sandman.
but i havent finnished it yet, so i look forward to it. then 11:00 came about and it was time to take the bus to see William. i dont know how i felt about it, i knew that i was nervous because i started dictating to myself thoughts in the third person, like i was in a story. i do that way too much for it to be healthy. but yeah, i dont know, i like being with him (after about half an hour) but the warming up, and the before initial contact i want to be anywhere BUT where i am about to go.
so i meet him at the beers and we go for the traditional subway ^^ and then to JJ's were he wants to buy a T-Shirt, but has forgotten all of his money, so no T-Shirt.
(hmm i think i was going to say something more, but i forgot)
ANYWAY i digress.
oh yeah thats what it was.
i feel, really horrible when im around Will because i dont know, i really like him and everything but i feel like his fucking mother sometimes. and, his consumption of sugar, its not, okay, its something instilled in me by my father but you just dont eat raw sugar, ever, its just not something you do.
yes so in my controling dominatrix motherly way, i persuaded him to take me home already^^
oh my god, his house is beautiful, and his neighbourhood! oh its just wonderful. in a really twisted dirty industrial way, there is an allyway you have to walk down with walls so high it really is mezmerising, and a little arch at the end of it like a gateway. and the alleway enterance is framed by tall tall houses, grey and grubby dirty faded yellow with rusted pipes twisting ina nd out of them, its how i image Scribble Boy's town would look like.
his house is really grand! victorian in design with lots of big rooms. his livving room is old fashioned, his kitchen is modern, his bedroom is a TIP! he he.
his mum is really nice, but such a controll freak! but i knew that already really, from the way he acts. and she calls him William darling, which is pretty cool if you ask me. she was really nice to me and we had a nice conversation about moving into the country (because of corse i mentioned that i used to live in london :P)
his brother, well his brother is a 14 year old. his sister seems okay, sort of a grownup version of Hannah though...
oh well, it was (in a sadistic way) great watching him interact with his siblings, because they were obviously taking the piss because i was there and he was obviously pissed off with them, ive never seen Will 'mean' so i dont know, i liked it ^^.
we wernt allowed into his room, but his mum went out at three so...
eh heh.
oh god it was wierd and embarasing and amazing and thrilling and horrible.
i didnt really expect to be rolling about on his (unmade ^^) bed minus a top and bra. but there you go, shit happens and it was terrible and embarasing and will probably be happaning again.
ha ha we got to his house at about 12:45, and left at 5:30. yeah, plenty of time.
then he walked me back to the bus in a really wonderful comfortable silence, just holding hands and walking. got on bus (had a really nice bus driver ^^) and sat in the back seat, without shoes and feeling very very shaken, but happy. then this black guy walks on.
hehe.
and i look at him, and im too tired to smile, so it must have looked like i was glearing.
so we paid no attention to each other, untill he put his feet up on the seat opposite and got them covered in wet chewing gum, and they were really nice shoes as well, so he was all like 'oh god disgusting' and obviously i was looking (trying not to laugh) and he says to me 'these buses are so dirty' and what could i do but agree. so he comes and sits next to me and we have a nice chat and he was really sort of 'belive in yourself, dont harbour negative thoughts, you can do anything' sort of corny inspiering shit. but it was cool (though i had a really hard time understanding what he was saying as he mumbled and had quiet a strong acsent) anyway i made it seem that i was some sort of party/clubbing animal, because he assumed that when i said that i was so tired and spaced out, that id been at it all night.
so getting off the bus he was all like 'do you want to come and have a cup of something with me' and i said 'sorry, my dads picking me up and if im late he'll eat me alive' so he asked for my number, and i was like, meh what the hell and he asked when he could ring me and i said after the weekend so... watch this space. he was nice, i hope to god he fogets about me.
so yup there we go, two guys two days and im taken >.<
someone up there has a mean sence of humour!
back home now SO hungry!
FOOD! *insert apropriate noises*