'House'

okay seriously seriously pissed off now!
seriously, okay life is not going great for me right now. i dont know what it is but i feel im aproaching one of my huge huge angry moods that lasts for days or entering my depression cycle again. i dont want to do that, im not sure when it was but i broke out of it and now i can see it looming.

mhhhhh i thought it was thursday today which ment that House would be on, but its not its a wednesday so no House. that made me so so angry i just wanted to cry but like always i couldnt!
i hate not being able to cry, i used to be able to do it whenever but now i cant cry ever and its so so frustrating, i feel i need to do something that will justifie what im feeling inside.
i hate alot, well no i am disliking alot of people right now...
mainly a guy, i cant belive it i just cant fucking belive him i hate him i hate him i hate him!
but i have not given up not yet, im not looking for love i just want a nice small relationship thats all, i dont want sex i dont want big fuck off 'i love you's i just want someone i can hang with and talk to and hug, you know but just not as a friend
>:(
and the ass isnt even online, i know somethings wrong because he said that he doesnt go online when hes upset but i just want to talk to him, i feel like i have imagined the whole thing and that he doesnt even exist.
and people keep coming up to me and asking me how its going on with him and i dont even know how they know about him!
i just want them to leave me alone.
i hate him
hatehatehate!
i cant belive how not being able to see House has made me so angry!
i love that show, and i love Hue Laurrie.
in other news, im fucking freezing!
more news, i texted ryan....i feel better for it but now it depends on if he texts back?
i dont know, as i have said before:
i could jump and i could fly
but i could fall and then id die
listening to moulin rouge disc two which alltogether as a cd is better than number one!
it has a nicer overall feel to it, the first one has like four amazing songs on it and the rest im sad to say are shit. no. two has like one amazing song but they are all pretty good
okay thats all for now, im actualy shaking now im so cold ah fuck!
i want chocolate!