Mmhhpp

tired, drew ryan today, tured out shit i coloured it wrong i may end up cutting it up and doing something else with it...the top half worked but the bottom didnt.
hes not online ither grrr i miss him and that really annoys me because i feel that now its becoming very one sided, hes just this thing to keep me from slipping into anger, depression or whatever who pops up every now and again to remend me he exists.
got D of E on saturday and i am not prepeared at all! i cant belive it my dad is away which means that i wont be able to get it untill friday night and i have forgotten how to put it up ohshitohshitohshit! he is going to be so angry with me...oh i dont want this i just want to cry! i dont have the energy to deal with this
i just want it all to stop! i feel really bogged down and tired.
i have just listened to lostprophets and linkin park for a straight five hours thats like 6 times for each album....
my eyes hurt, i just want to.....go to sleep for ages and wake up again in my perfect world...
hmm perfect world, mixed school, no exams, learing Japanese instead of German...ryan....livvie living in her own house with ned...me living in Camden with my jessie and ryan and jessie's uber hot emo boyfriend...michelle living in her mansion with tolkien...
mmhhpp...
i hate this so much....sleep...for ever....maybe...
i am not going to get up tomorrow, i am just going to lie there and think 'what the fuck is the point' and i wont be able to answer myself...so i wont get up...no actualy i lie, i am going to get up for japanese, so i will begin my sleep wednesday...
i need someone to save me,
'one step closer to the edge...and im about to break'